Parenting and the Golden Rule

Our Parents' Group will meet this Sunday, November 22, at 12 pm

The topic for our parents' group this week is 'The Golden Rule' and how it relates to parenting, discipline, and teaching.

The 'do onto others' rule could relate to parenting in a numbers of ways. When we consider what we would like done onto us, parents might justify their disciplinary policies with assurance that they 'know what's best for their child'. Certainly if they were a child with omnipotent, adult-like knowledge, they would want this done onto themselves for their own good.

Yet, I have sat in many classrooms and pondered how remarkable it is that the benefit of a given lesson is so apparent to myself, and yet lost to those students who are having it imposed upon them. We may abstractly justify our actions in relation to doing onto children as appropriate from the 'theoretical adult-child who gets it' perspective, but that isn't the reality of how the child is experiencing that moment.

Does the Golden rule really mean we have the right to impose upon others what we feel is best for them? In most contexts Unitarians would vehemently deny that this is fair and appropriate. We are a collective of people who are united in our belief that it is wrong to force our personal views on others.

If this is the case, where do we draw the line when it comes to children? How do we actively consider the child's point of view and personal perspective, while still imposing the level of structure and discipline that they need?